Everyone seems to have excuses for why they're struggling. The logical acrobatics people can do to direct the blame for where they are in life to anything other than themselves is astonishing. I'm sorry that I don't believe you. I don't accept your excuses.
If you say you're a victim then life is nothing more than something that happens to you. But if everything is your fault, that means you caused it. And if you caused it then that means you can change it
I was trapped in victimhood for a LONG time. Instead of working through my childhood trauma, I suppressed it with alcohol and drug abuse (denial, poor choices) which, of course, just leads to more and more abuse/trauma. It is a vicious and destructive cycle however, we humans are beyond capable and resilient and can accomplish anything we put our minds to.
Every day is an opportunity to stand up for ourselves and change our story. It’s never too late to get into the driver’s seat 😉
I just wanted to add that whatever happens to us in our childhood is NOT our fault however, it is our responsibility to heal ourselves. (Just in case any of your readers are still suffering from PTSD, etc.)
I agree with your general sentiment however I treat mine as my fault. Doesn't matter if I'm right or wrong, it only matters that it means I'm in control
I think when you grow up as a child in DEATH, where death is around you every day, you learn to become fearless;
I started martial arts at 5 years a day, in those days of LA 'black karate federation' ruled our world; Once you become fearless, and lived through war you just step through it; No different than say now a Palestine child growing up in a battle field;
...
Probably the greatest life skill I think growing up around Giants who would just as soon kill you as look at you, is to look at everybody in the eye and show them DEEP RESPECT; As a kid hanging around some of the 'club-houses' ( think hells angels ) I learned the great skill of navigating the den of monsters without getting my bones broken and my teeth knocked out; A great skill that can carry on your entire life; Whether it be walking into a bar in the wilds of ALaska, or sailing into a Muslim town; Every where you go on earth is the same-same;
Show everybody you cross paths with deep respect, in every village on earth that old man on the street, very likely has a son who is the biggest & baddest MOFU in town;
...
Obviously I can't deal with the 'victim' bullshit, like I already explained with the psychologist and two identical brothers; You at a young age either make a decision to crawl out of the shit or you don't; Once say your like 8 years of age and you haven't begun self-study its virtually impossible;
I was lucky I didn't have to do the Malcolm-X route as this OP delves where years in prison give you time to read, reflect & learn;
I do see one common, Malcolm-X never had a father figure, sounds like this OP didn't either I didn't; Everything that I learned about being a 'man' I had to learn on my own;
I'm of the opinion these days that most of our 'dysfunctional' familys and especially the nanny-gov are the enemys of child development;
If I had born 200 years ago I would have preferred to join a sailboat to the new world as a kid cleaning the decks and just travel the world; That's how industrious kids of +6 years old used to climb the ladder of life;
Sounds like the OP has his own kids, and takes care of them; This is an exception;
I never had kids, when I was a kid all the kids that passed 'juvenile-hall-LA' ( jail for kids ) on the way to foster-homes were sterilized; I have no regrets having no children gave me 100% freedom to explore the earth my entire life, mostly alone;
I am always amazed at what many people have gone through and still come out better on the other side - despite it all. GOOD FOR YOU !! Should be an inspiration for all.
I grew up in Watts-LA as a CHILD I remember the fires of the 1960's black smoke and they wouldn't let me out of the house;
Most influential book for me was "malcolmX" autobiography, he talks about how his mother committed suicide cuz the gov took all her children and put them into 'foster homes' ( jails for children )
I got into myself at about 12, spent all my time studying to make bombs&drugs, I liked to blow shit up and of course the hood loved drugs, I made LSD, and just about everything by 14; Started sitting in college classes ( at the back and kept my mouth shut ) at 14 so I could learn more physics, math, & chemistry;
Along the way of studying I spent less&less time on the street and more&more in the library;
..
Probably the best thing one can do is Get the fuck out of the HELL-ZONE, I left LA to Alaska when I was barely 20 years, and never looked back preceded to get jobs in the OIL-BIZ and just climbed the ladders, shit that took the PHD's months&years I could 'code-up' in a day, having taught myself to program back during my days of sitting in college lecutures, I would go into the computer rooms and read punched cards ( from the garbage bins ) and figure out what they were doing soon I could 'write my own programs' because I knew the 'math' and I could 'program' and I knew the gig of the OIL-BIZ was to find the oil and pump it out of the ground; I took every problem with GUSTO and would work on it 24/7
By the time I was 24 I was bored with tech and especially 'working for the man' quit and started my own businesses kept them small enough so I could go 'sail around the world'
Went back to LA a few times in early 1980's, its seemed worse than I remember; But what I remember most as a 8 year old kid is riding my bike along the LA River in East LA coughing up blood from the smog;
Traveled the entire earth, always 'traveled poor' also slept on train station floors 'near the gypsys' good people, take care of their own, and love music & dancing;
....
HELL SELF EDUCATE, and then just keep applying for the fucking JOB work a few years just to learn their 'scam and/or gid' then go do it yourself, the biggest LEARN for me was that great majority of the PHD's were lazy incompetent MORONS
Which explains the COVID-19 MD & PHD problem we have today WHY they were so easy to just go along with being MORONS and ignore scientific reality;
FUCK THE SYSTEM
I now think that GOV has created a system where parents are just 'prison guards' that often its better for a kids to just 'run away'
Like the OP say's here he could spot a cop at 6, hell yes; My sister at 10 was a professional prostitute, I was so fucking shy of girls that I didn't have my first GF until 19, yet when I was 14 I was fucking girls in a 'train' there were always everynight somewhere where somebody was pulling a train, but you didn't talk you didn't know, you just waited in line with your 'bros' got your turn, and went on with the night;
MY point is they used to put kids 4-6 in factorys and work 12 hours a day, most kids are plenty ready by 6 to ride a bike around the hood deliver drugs collect money, and have their own biz;
I noted properly at that age myself white suits they called businessmen, youths organized they called 'gangs' they were all the same;
...
On the subject of 'fault', my ex-wife used to say that I had the self-confidence of a rhinoceroses, why not? Just like the guy here say's go apply for the job, 90% of the time your smarter than anybody you will meet in the interview
In closing a perfect explanation on why some people are miserable losers and others are child prodigies is this; There were once two twin brothers both born to alcoholic parents, a psychiatrist interviewed them both; One brother a famous brain-surgeon, another brother a bum living on the street, we called 'skid row' in LA;
When the psych asked the bum brother "Why did you turn out this way?" the bum reported "My parents were alcoholics, what else you expect?"
When the psych asked the brain-surgeon, why did you turn out this way, he said "My parents were alcoholics, what else would you expect? That I would emulate them??"
TWO exact brothers, two exact home-family life experiences and yet two completely different path's in life;
One brother 'learnedhelpless' a fucking loser, the other brother set his targets high and climbed the mountain and never quit, the BUM brother never he stepped off the couch let alone climbing the mountain;
...
Lastly On EDUCATION at high levels, MALCOLM-X self-educated himself in PRISON not unlike the OP here's story, I self educated my self as a child 12-16 my just living in the library's and hiding at the back of college lectures ; The high-schools, jr-highs were all worthless shit, the teachers for the most part were all lazy morons;
There is a famous quote about a child that wanted to be like "MOZART" when the child was 6 he asked he piano teacher, can you teach me to write a 'CONCERTO" like Mozart did at 3 years of age;
To which the piano teacher replied Mozart didn't ask anybody how to play, or write music or write a concerto he just did it;
That is the difference between a CUCK/Loser and somebody who gets shit done in life "JUST FUCKING DO IT"
You hit it right on the head about college degrees, I have worked with some of the most pathetic people who are in hundreds of thousands of dollars in student loans for fancy degrees to do exactly what I do right along side of them with high school diploma that was basically given to me because I definitely didn't "earn it". I just find youtube or find tutors to help me. I have no massive debt either. They also barely do their work and are so bitter about so much.
Lots of reasons for this, the worst I ever saw in my life is the Indians
Because of their 'caste' system only the elite kids go to college, and because books cost a fortune, even the poor kids can't self-educate, not unlike the new-world or USA pre-1800's when book were only owned by the rich
...
I noticed when hiring Indians they couldn't and wouldn't work, when digging deeper I found that they were never expected to work, not real work, sure they would go to college and get a MS, or PHD; But never asked to 'work' so working for me they went nutz quickly when they found out they had to work;
Now using that analogy to the USA system, most of the kids who go to the 'elite schools' are elite spawn, they're inbred and dumber than shit, once they get hired by legacy companys, they can't be fired because of their elite legacy blood, so they just get parked in the company to 'Do no harm"
This is why no matter where ever you ever work in the USA, you will find that 10% do 90% of the real work, make the real products and finish them and 90% watch porn on their phones, or play computer games;
...
While the Indian system is explicit caste the USA system is implicit caste, where the poor or middle or lower class may get an education, or even college, but only taught by pathetic loser teachers;
Which is why I at about 12 years of age used to take the bus up to Pasadena and sit through Feynman lectures or any physic, math, or chemistry class I could find a spot on the floor to sit in the back of the room and take notes; That's the ONLY fucking real education I ever got; Because only at the elite colleges did they have real fucking professors that taught useful concepts;
...
The problem I saw is even the kids who graduated from Stanford, while they were smart and could solve 'problems' because they were elite, because they never actually had a 'job' until they finished college, they didn't have what I would call 'work habits'
As a he kid in LA who did paper-routes at 6+ and was always hustling and making money and working, hell even 'pumping gas' at 14, you learn 'work habits'
It's not just being smart, its working until the job is done, its being smart about how you approach the work, its planning out in detail in your mind and on paper long before you start a job how it will be done;
It's obvious but I'll say it almost all people who get shit done were 'child prodigies' meaning like Mozart nobody had to tell them to 'write music' they just DID-IT;
Same for a kid in the hood who delivers drugs at 6, why not learn chemistry and make your own drugs and be running your own chem-lab ( now called meth lab ) by 8 years, and why not do it in secret, never ask permission just do-it; Then give out samples to friends until you have your 'process' baked-in
Like I said when the poor urban ferals 'do-it' its called 'gangs', but when rich zionist ZOG suits make "Opiates" and hook&kill of most of the USA its called 'business;
I've found that most college kids went to party & make connections. I guess it worked? But they are broke and filling in excel sheets with someone like me who simply was available when the agency called. I have always found a way to work from a young age, baby sitting, cleaning houses, helping in a daycare center, fast food, anything as a kid. I've seen a lot of the same thing among most college grads who just figured they would sit somewhere and go to meetings all day. A lot of them do. They get by on pity or scaring HR and do nothing using race, gender or whatever to avoid accountability. This is why I am trying to run my own pirate ship. I've often been shocked at how little they know about anything. Or they intentionally create problems they then solve and become resentful of anyone who can provide solutions or have any real ambition, causing problems. I think it is a huge issue for business in this country.
Yes, a major reason I quit "Corporate World" ( working for the man ) working for the man shit, is I noted early on that people were always trying to steal my work, even projects that had my name on the plan, and the code written by me they would say "That is my work", to which I would say, then why is your name not on it? To which they would remain silent;
The other thing just dumb fucking complaints, just common sabotage, because they were dumb & lazy, and the their only option of competition is to destroy the competition, not better the competition.
Hell yes, start your own company and never hire or fire quickly the assholes
...
I will say there is an ADVANTAGE of working corporate when young, it gave me access to the most powerful computers of the day, and I got to work with famous people, up and close to find out who was a fraud, and who was the real deal; That life lesson is useful the rest of your life in small private biz
Yeah corporate world is run by middle managers who are like trolls at the bridge letting in who they want, not who can do anything. A lot of fear of someone taking their job and they should be they don't do much. They hold CEOs hostage with the help of HR. A lot of dumb complaints and lazy people. Working in corporate is useful, it has its place and time but yeah get the hell out don't make it forever or you will end up bitter and broke. Now with AI it is anybody's guess.
YEP, but its still essential to pay your dues and spend some time in their rat cage and learn the reality, its one thing to diss them, its another thing to seem them inside with your own eyes
Sort of like a man writing a book on prisons, who never slept a night in a prison
You can't really understand the USA Corporation until you have served some time :)
While I formally enrolled in college classes when I was 14, I didn't attend 'college' full time until I was around 17, to which I was deeply dissapointed
Every fucking person in the chemistry classes & lab's were just taking the class to get into MED School so they could be doctor, never met one fucking student who was interested or fascinated with 'chemistry' at the time;
When I was young, I made a point to never talk with 'older students' I on occasion talk to prof's but only when they approached me. It was a prof that told me when I was 14 that I could enroll in his class the first time;
...
Yes, I have no doubt that 80% of the jocks at my college ended up dropping out and never making it to med-school, as you say they're there to get laid & party;
One advantage of being a ghetto kid is by 17 I was bored to death of drugs, and getting high, drunk, or even fucking women that I didn't know; Almost all these kids were experiencing in 'new things'
Sort of like the famous Preachers daughter who is kept innocent until college and quickly becomes the biggest slut&drunk on campus because only she has discovered 'something new & different"
I tried college but at the time didn't know I had a learning disability or vision issues as a young adult but it was disappointing for sure, glad it was just community college. I have a good friend who is a PhD in biochemistry she grew up like I did & found something she loved, worked hard at it coming from poverty as a high school dropout to a professor who discovered a corn gene, she even taught it at a major university for a bit but stopped because of the students having zero respect for what she devoted so much of her life to simple to get into med school. They were desperate too & willing to buy her off for better grades or whatever else they could offer so they could one day be a doctor. Scary to know that there are doctors out there who did this and got away with it She was disgusted. She does something else entirely now that pays so much better. I grew up fast around drugs and alcohol, family members were drug dealers, bikers and other ne'er do wells, so I was careful not to get into it to much and having done any of it in years. I found way to many "preacher's kids" who figured I was a "safe" person to go discover themselves due to my background, with while their straight laced civilian life back home could continue and yeah they were the worst.
Self-Study is the best, a kid ( +3 years of age ) needs to have a lot of books around the house as a child and early on learn to read, and be given stimulation to understand the world around them;
I hate to say it but IMHO if a child isn't learning say calculus by 12 years of age, they'll never be learning advanced math by 20
So often the system who tell drop-outs of high-school 'just code' kids that didn't even get algebra or even 5th grade math, impossible to take somebody +16 and develop their mind for computational thinking,
Sure you can have monkeys 'make a website' but that isn't programming say a GPS weapons system.
...
I was lucky at the age of 8, I wanted to know where the drugs came from I wanted to make my own drugs, not just deliver them on the streets on bicycle, along the journey I found out that I had to know chemistry, math, and later physics; I became addicted to physics by 14 would read any advanced book I could find
Nobody ever knew what I was doing, I never got caught
So many kids growing up went to jail or died, but I always like our OP I could smell the cops before they even arrived;
...
I remember once a gang of buddy's stole a car and drove to Tijuana for a night of donkey-fucking shows, while walking around my friends started a bar-fight with the owner, I could smell the cops; I walked across the street and slowly up the street and sat down the dark and watched, the TJ pigs arrived and hauled everybody to jail, later I found the stolen car, found a mexican with a coat-hanger got in slept in the car, in the morning walked to USA border, along the way I found one of my friends on the street, he said the gang was in Jail until they all paid $35 USD cash; They stayed in that jail for weeks in their own shit, just a big 10x10 concrete room with dozens of guys mostly US-MIL, and mexicans, and my friends, they would spray the cell down a few days with water, but people just sat in their vomit & shit, if you wanted to shit, you went to the open hole in the center of the room and shit or pissed;
It took weeks of me driving alone back to TJ to get all my friends out, most of their parents were like "Let them rot"
Some of the worst drug addicts I ever saw were the goody two shoe preacher's kids that discovered "DRUGS&SEX" later in life;
By the time I was 16 years old I was so fucking BORED with that shit that I never did drugs for decades ( I do make pot granola bars now for the hell of it, sometime good for sleeping with a backache ), I also didn't drink booze 16-24, except I would by a six back of dos-eques ( mexican beer ) on friday night, and drink at home a few bottles, that was it; Never went out; Just worked, and on the weekends went mtn-climbing;
Good healthy life, still feel same-same
Like I said, most of my friends from LA died during high-school age, the one that didn't died from alcohol poisoning by 50
Really like this. I may share this with my 3 teens who struggle with various degrees of motivation, confidence, purpose. Very inspirational. Thank you!
This made my Friday! Thank you. I didn't go to prison but lived a very similar life in a lot of ways, especially the childhood. People for the most part never thought I would do anything other than end up, institutionalized, incarcerated or dead. Many who were supposed have my best interest as a kid even told me this pretty often, probably because they wanted that for me. I never did any of those things, still haven't. Learned to work in a world with a learning disability that was never addressed by the adults around me despite their ability to do so, no formal education, mostly self taught. Thank you internet and temp agencies before that. I have a stable loving marriage of over a decade, a great relationship with my stepkid and their spouse. I have had to work twice as hard as than most professionally because I don't think like the world does, but I have done it. Because of that I have seen the world and worked for all kinds of powerful, interesting people. I own a great home and a growing business in one of the most competitive places in the US and the world. I have pets and plants I have kept alive for decades. It was hard, I have made huge mistakes at times, mostly because I had no guidance but I still did it. A lot of stuff terrifies me to this day, but I still do it. I have my health, a few good friends very little debt, a home I love and a life I still can't believe I have but here I am. So yeah I've got problems but I do my best every day to deal with them. Right on for getting out there and fighting for a good life. I love reading what you have to say, I look forward to all of your posts. Sure, it isn't a big deal to some to not go to jail, not have massive debt, good health, decent relationships but from where I came from it was monumental to do any of it. I don't make many excuses for myself. I get frustrated at how many times I run across people who have used all kinds of excuses or manipulations to do nothing despite having more education, opportunities and help that I ever did. If I can do something with myself anyone can. You sir are an inspiration.
"The logical acrobatics people can do to direct the blame for where they are in life to anything other than themselves is astonishing. I'm sorry that I don't believe you. I don't accept your excuses." What an amazing sentence. It is an admonishment we should all follow and every high school student should read before graduating.
Justacon - I’m just curious... was the life of Jesus the inspiration to your new self discovery and commitment towards being your better self???
I appreciate you sharing your story with us! You must know, before you were born and as you faced tragedy throughout your life:
“Indeed the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not be afraid; You are far more valuable than many sparrows.” Luke 12:7
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalm 56:8
Maybe without you knowing it, Jesus has been with you and loved you through everything you’ve experienced. It’s hard to believe in a loving God (Father) when our own birth fathers care not one wit, but our Heavenly Father has proven that He is faithful, my friend. 🙏🏻 Gby and your loved ones as you continue to take the road least traveled... that will lead you to His door!
No, I can't say any brand of faith led me here. If I'm being completely honest, I'm keeping a promise to the men I left behind in those walls. With 15 years, I was the short timer. Most of them will never get out and many put their hopes and dreams into me. I love my brothers, so now I live for them because society said we were a lost cause. I have to make them proud, those men who raised me in there.
Wow. I feel like you’ve just written my story, from a masculine perspective.
As long as we keep pointing the finger at anyone and everything but ourselves, we are just making excuses and giving our power away.
If you say you're a victim then life is nothing more than something that happens to you. But if everything is your fault, that means you caused it. And if you caused it then that means you can change it
I was trapped in victimhood for a LONG time. Instead of working through my childhood trauma, I suppressed it with alcohol and drug abuse (denial, poor choices) which, of course, just leads to more and more abuse/trauma. It is a vicious and destructive cycle however, we humans are beyond capable and resilient and can accomplish anything we put our minds to.
Every day is an opportunity to stand up for ourselves and change our story. It’s never too late to get into the driver’s seat 😉
I just wanted to add that whatever happens to us in our childhood is NOT our fault however, it is our responsibility to heal ourselves. (Just in case any of your readers are still suffering from PTSD, etc.)
I agree with your general sentiment however I treat mine as my fault. Doesn't matter if I'm right or wrong, it only matters that it means I'm in control
Well said. Congratulations on making it out to the other side.
I think when you grow up as a child in DEATH, where death is around you every day, you learn to become fearless;
I started martial arts at 5 years a day, in those days of LA 'black karate federation' ruled our world; Once you become fearless, and lived through war you just step through it; No different than say now a Palestine child growing up in a battle field;
...
Probably the greatest life skill I think growing up around Giants who would just as soon kill you as look at you, is to look at everybody in the eye and show them DEEP RESPECT; As a kid hanging around some of the 'club-houses' ( think hells angels ) I learned the great skill of navigating the den of monsters without getting my bones broken and my teeth knocked out; A great skill that can carry on your entire life; Whether it be walking into a bar in the wilds of ALaska, or sailing into a Muslim town; Every where you go on earth is the same-same;
Show everybody you cross paths with deep respect, in every village on earth that old man on the street, very likely has a son who is the biggest & baddest MOFU in town;
...
Obviously I can't deal with the 'victim' bullshit, like I already explained with the psychologist and two identical brothers; You at a young age either make a decision to crawl out of the shit or you don't; Once say your like 8 years of age and you haven't begun self-study its virtually impossible;
I was lucky I didn't have to do the Malcolm-X route as this OP delves where years in prison give you time to read, reflect & learn;
I do see one common, Malcolm-X never had a father figure, sounds like this OP didn't either I didn't; Everything that I learned about being a 'man' I had to learn on my own;
I'm of the opinion these days that most of our 'dysfunctional' familys and especially the nanny-gov are the enemys of child development;
If I had born 200 years ago I would have preferred to join a sailboat to the new world as a kid cleaning the decks and just travel the world; That's how industrious kids of +6 years old used to climb the ladder of life;
Sounds like the OP has his own kids, and takes care of them; This is an exception;
I never had kids, when I was a kid all the kids that passed 'juvenile-hall-LA' ( jail for kids ) on the way to foster-homes were sterilized; I have no regrets having no children gave me 100% freedom to explore the earth my entire life, mostly alone;
There are redemption arcs, and then there’s this.
Inspiring
I am always amazed at what many people have gone through and still come out better on the other side - despite it all. GOOD FOR YOU !! Should be an inspiration for all.
My goal was less to inspire and more aiming to challenge. Thank you fir the kind words
I grew up in Watts-LA as a CHILD I remember the fires of the 1960's black smoke and they wouldn't let me out of the house;
Most influential book for me was "malcolmX" autobiography, he talks about how his mother committed suicide cuz the gov took all her children and put them into 'foster homes' ( jails for children )
I got into myself at about 12, spent all my time studying to make bombs&drugs, I liked to blow shit up and of course the hood loved drugs, I made LSD, and just about everything by 14; Started sitting in college classes ( at the back and kept my mouth shut ) at 14 so I could learn more physics, math, & chemistry;
Along the way of studying I spent less&less time on the street and more&more in the library;
..
Probably the best thing one can do is Get the fuck out of the HELL-ZONE, I left LA to Alaska when I was barely 20 years, and never looked back preceded to get jobs in the OIL-BIZ and just climbed the ladders, shit that took the PHD's months&years I could 'code-up' in a day, having taught myself to program back during my days of sitting in college lecutures, I would go into the computer rooms and read punched cards ( from the garbage bins ) and figure out what they were doing soon I could 'write my own programs' because I knew the 'math' and I could 'program' and I knew the gig of the OIL-BIZ was to find the oil and pump it out of the ground; I took every problem with GUSTO and would work on it 24/7
By the time I was 24 I was bored with tech and especially 'working for the man' quit and started my own businesses kept them small enough so I could go 'sail around the world'
Went back to LA a few times in early 1980's, its seemed worse than I remember; But what I remember most as a 8 year old kid is riding my bike along the LA River in East LA coughing up blood from the smog;
Traveled the entire earth, always 'traveled poor' also slept on train station floors 'near the gypsys' good people, take care of their own, and love music & dancing;
....
HELL SELF EDUCATE, and then just keep applying for the fucking JOB work a few years just to learn their 'scam and/or gid' then go do it yourself, the biggest LEARN for me was that great majority of the PHD's were lazy incompetent MORONS
Which explains the COVID-19 MD & PHD problem we have today WHY they were so easy to just go along with being MORONS and ignore scientific reality;
FUCK THE SYSTEM
I now think that GOV has created a system where parents are just 'prison guards' that often its better for a kids to just 'run away'
Like the OP say's here he could spot a cop at 6, hell yes; My sister at 10 was a professional prostitute, I was so fucking shy of girls that I didn't have my first GF until 19, yet when I was 14 I was fucking girls in a 'train' there were always everynight somewhere where somebody was pulling a train, but you didn't talk you didn't know, you just waited in line with your 'bros' got your turn, and went on with the night;
MY point is they used to put kids 4-6 in factorys and work 12 hours a day, most kids are plenty ready by 6 to ride a bike around the hood deliver drugs collect money, and have their own biz;
I noted properly at that age myself white suits they called businessmen, youths organized they called 'gangs' they were all the same;
...
On the subject of 'fault', my ex-wife used to say that I had the self-confidence of a rhinoceroses, why not? Just like the guy here say's go apply for the job, 90% of the time your smarter than anybody you will meet in the interview
In closing a perfect explanation on why some people are miserable losers and others are child prodigies is this; There were once two twin brothers both born to alcoholic parents, a psychiatrist interviewed them both; One brother a famous brain-surgeon, another brother a bum living on the street, we called 'skid row' in LA;
When the psych asked the bum brother "Why did you turn out this way?" the bum reported "My parents were alcoholics, what else you expect?"
When the psych asked the brain-surgeon, why did you turn out this way, he said "My parents were alcoholics, what else would you expect? That I would emulate them??"
TWO exact brothers, two exact home-family life experiences and yet two completely different path's in life;
One brother 'learnedhelpless' a fucking loser, the other brother set his targets high and climbed the mountain and never quit, the BUM brother never he stepped off the couch let alone climbing the mountain;
...
Lastly On EDUCATION at high levels, MALCOLM-X self-educated himself in PRISON not unlike the OP here's story, I self educated my self as a child 12-16 my just living in the library's and hiding at the back of college lectures ; The high-schools, jr-highs were all worthless shit, the teachers for the most part were all lazy morons;
There is a famous quote about a child that wanted to be like "MOZART" when the child was 6 he asked he piano teacher, can you teach me to write a 'CONCERTO" like Mozart did at 3 years of age;
To which the piano teacher replied Mozart didn't ask anybody how to play, or write music or write a concerto he just did it;
That is the difference between a CUCK/Loser and somebody who gets shit done in life "JUST FUCKING DO IT"
You hit it right on the head about college degrees, I have worked with some of the most pathetic people who are in hundreds of thousands of dollars in student loans for fancy degrees to do exactly what I do right along side of them with high school diploma that was basically given to me because I definitely didn't "earn it". I just find youtube or find tutors to help me. I have no massive debt either. They also barely do their work and are so bitter about so much.
Lots of reasons for this, the worst I ever saw in my life is the Indians
Because of their 'caste' system only the elite kids go to college, and because books cost a fortune, even the poor kids can't self-educate, not unlike the new-world or USA pre-1800's when book were only owned by the rich
...
I noticed when hiring Indians they couldn't and wouldn't work, when digging deeper I found that they were never expected to work, not real work, sure they would go to college and get a MS, or PHD; But never asked to 'work' so working for me they went nutz quickly when they found out they had to work;
Now using that analogy to the USA system, most of the kids who go to the 'elite schools' are elite spawn, they're inbred and dumber than shit, once they get hired by legacy companys, they can't be fired because of their elite legacy blood, so they just get parked in the company to 'Do no harm"
This is why no matter where ever you ever work in the USA, you will find that 10% do 90% of the real work, make the real products and finish them and 90% watch porn on their phones, or play computer games;
...
While the Indian system is explicit caste the USA system is implicit caste, where the poor or middle or lower class may get an education, or even college, but only taught by pathetic loser teachers;
Which is why I at about 12 years of age used to take the bus up to Pasadena and sit through Feynman lectures or any physic, math, or chemistry class I could find a spot on the floor to sit in the back of the room and take notes; That's the ONLY fucking real education I ever got; Because only at the elite colleges did they have real fucking professors that taught useful concepts;
...
The problem I saw is even the kids who graduated from Stanford, while they were smart and could solve 'problems' because they were elite, because they never actually had a 'job' until they finished college, they didn't have what I would call 'work habits'
As a he kid in LA who did paper-routes at 6+ and was always hustling and making money and working, hell even 'pumping gas' at 14, you learn 'work habits'
It's not just being smart, its working until the job is done, its being smart about how you approach the work, its planning out in detail in your mind and on paper long before you start a job how it will be done;
It's obvious but I'll say it almost all people who get shit done were 'child prodigies' meaning like Mozart nobody had to tell them to 'write music' they just DID-IT;
Same for a kid in the hood who delivers drugs at 6, why not learn chemistry and make your own drugs and be running your own chem-lab ( now called meth lab ) by 8 years, and why not do it in secret, never ask permission just do-it; Then give out samples to friends until you have your 'process' baked-in
Like I said when the poor urban ferals 'do-it' its called 'gangs', but when rich zionist ZOG suits make "Opiates" and hook&kill of most of the USA its called 'business;
I've found that most college kids went to party & make connections. I guess it worked? But they are broke and filling in excel sheets with someone like me who simply was available when the agency called. I have always found a way to work from a young age, baby sitting, cleaning houses, helping in a daycare center, fast food, anything as a kid. I've seen a lot of the same thing among most college grads who just figured they would sit somewhere and go to meetings all day. A lot of them do. They get by on pity or scaring HR and do nothing using race, gender or whatever to avoid accountability. This is why I am trying to run my own pirate ship. I've often been shocked at how little they know about anything. Or they intentionally create problems they then solve and become resentful of anyone who can provide solutions or have any real ambition, causing problems. I think it is a huge issue for business in this country.
Yes, a major reason I quit "Corporate World" ( working for the man ) working for the man shit, is I noted early on that people were always trying to steal my work, even projects that had my name on the plan, and the code written by me they would say "That is my work", to which I would say, then why is your name not on it? To which they would remain silent;
The other thing just dumb fucking complaints, just common sabotage, because they were dumb & lazy, and the their only option of competition is to destroy the competition, not better the competition.
Hell yes, start your own company and never hire or fire quickly the assholes
...
I will say there is an ADVANTAGE of working corporate when young, it gave me access to the most powerful computers of the day, and I got to work with famous people, up and close to find out who was a fraud, and who was the real deal; That life lesson is useful the rest of your life in small private biz
Yeah corporate world is run by middle managers who are like trolls at the bridge letting in who they want, not who can do anything. A lot of fear of someone taking their job and they should be they don't do much. They hold CEOs hostage with the help of HR. A lot of dumb complaints and lazy people. Working in corporate is useful, it has its place and time but yeah get the hell out don't make it forever or you will end up bitter and broke. Now with AI it is anybody's guess.
YEP, but its still essential to pay your dues and spend some time in their rat cage and learn the reality, its one thing to diss them, its another thing to seem them inside with your own eyes
Sort of like a man writing a book on prisons, who never slept a night in a prison
You can't really understand the USA Corporation until you have served some time :)
Well that is an entirely different story;
While I formally enrolled in college classes when I was 14, I didn't attend 'college' full time until I was around 17, to which I was deeply dissapointed
Every fucking person in the chemistry classes & lab's were just taking the class to get into MED School so they could be doctor, never met one fucking student who was interested or fascinated with 'chemistry' at the time;
When I was young, I made a point to never talk with 'older students' I on occasion talk to prof's but only when they approached me. It was a prof that told me when I was 14 that I could enroll in his class the first time;
...
Yes, I have no doubt that 80% of the jocks at my college ended up dropping out and never making it to med-school, as you say they're there to get laid & party;
One advantage of being a ghetto kid is by 17 I was bored to death of drugs, and getting high, drunk, or even fucking women that I didn't know; Almost all these kids were experiencing in 'new things'
Sort of like the famous Preachers daughter who is kept innocent until college and quickly becomes the biggest slut&drunk on campus because only she has discovered 'something new & different"
I tried college but at the time didn't know I had a learning disability or vision issues as a young adult but it was disappointing for sure, glad it was just community college. I have a good friend who is a PhD in biochemistry she grew up like I did & found something she loved, worked hard at it coming from poverty as a high school dropout to a professor who discovered a corn gene, she even taught it at a major university for a bit but stopped because of the students having zero respect for what she devoted so much of her life to simple to get into med school. They were desperate too & willing to buy her off for better grades or whatever else they could offer so they could one day be a doctor. Scary to know that there are doctors out there who did this and got away with it She was disgusted. She does something else entirely now that pays so much better. I grew up fast around drugs and alcohol, family members were drug dealers, bikers and other ne'er do wells, so I was careful not to get into it to much and having done any of it in years. I found way to many "preacher's kids" who figured I was a "safe" person to go discover themselves due to my background, with while their straight laced civilian life back home could continue and yeah they were the worst.
Self-Study is the best, a kid ( +3 years of age ) needs to have a lot of books around the house as a child and early on learn to read, and be given stimulation to understand the world around them;
I hate to say it but IMHO if a child isn't learning say calculus by 12 years of age, they'll never be learning advanced math by 20
So often the system who tell drop-outs of high-school 'just code' kids that didn't even get algebra or even 5th grade math, impossible to take somebody +16 and develop their mind for computational thinking,
Sure you can have monkeys 'make a website' but that isn't programming say a GPS weapons system.
...
I was lucky at the age of 8, I wanted to know where the drugs came from I wanted to make my own drugs, not just deliver them on the streets on bicycle, along the journey I found out that I had to know chemistry, math, and later physics; I became addicted to physics by 14 would read any advanced book I could find
Nobody ever knew what I was doing, I never got caught
So many kids growing up went to jail or died, but I always like our OP I could smell the cops before they even arrived;
...
I remember once a gang of buddy's stole a car and drove to Tijuana for a night of donkey-fucking shows, while walking around my friends started a bar-fight with the owner, I could smell the cops; I walked across the street and slowly up the street and sat down the dark and watched, the TJ pigs arrived and hauled everybody to jail, later I found the stolen car, found a mexican with a coat-hanger got in slept in the car, in the morning walked to USA border, along the way I found one of my friends on the street, he said the gang was in Jail until they all paid $35 USD cash; They stayed in that jail for weeks in their own shit, just a big 10x10 concrete room with dozens of guys mostly US-MIL, and mexicans, and my friends, they would spray the cell down a few days with water, but people just sat in their vomit & shit, if you wanted to shit, you went to the open hole in the center of the room and shit or pissed;
It took weeks of me driving alone back to TJ to get all my friends out, most of their parents were like "Let them rot"
Some of the worst drug addicts I ever saw were the goody two shoe preacher's kids that discovered "DRUGS&SEX" later in life;
By the time I was 16 years old I was so fucking BORED with that shit that I never did drugs for decades ( I do make pot granola bars now for the hell of it, sometime good for sleeping with a backache ), I also didn't drink booze 16-24, except I would by a six back of dos-eques ( mexican beer ) on friday night, and drink at home a few bottles, that was it; Never went out; Just worked, and on the weekends went mtn-climbing;
Good healthy life, still feel same-same
Like I said, most of my friends from LA died during high-school age, the one that didn't died from alcohol poisoning by 50
Really like this. I may share this with my 3 teens who struggle with various degrees of motivation, confidence, purpose. Very inspirational. Thank you!
This made my Friday! Thank you. I didn't go to prison but lived a very similar life in a lot of ways, especially the childhood. People for the most part never thought I would do anything other than end up, institutionalized, incarcerated or dead. Many who were supposed have my best interest as a kid even told me this pretty often, probably because they wanted that for me. I never did any of those things, still haven't. Learned to work in a world with a learning disability that was never addressed by the adults around me despite their ability to do so, no formal education, mostly self taught. Thank you internet and temp agencies before that. I have a stable loving marriage of over a decade, a great relationship with my stepkid and their spouse. I have had to work twice as hard as than most professionally because I don't think like the world does, but I have done it. Because of that I have seen the world and worked for all kinds of powerful, interesting people. I own a great home and a growing business in one of the most competitive places in the US and the world. I have pets and plants I have kept alive for decades. It was hard, I have made huge mistakes at times, mostly because I had no guidance but I still did it. A lot of stuff terrifies me to this day, but I still do it. I have my health, a few good friends very little debt, a home I love and a life I still can't believe I have but here I am. So yeah I've got problems but I do my best every day to deal with them. Right on for getting out there and fighting for a good life. I love reading what you have to say, I look forward to all of your posts. Sure, it isn't a big deal to some to not go to jail, not have massive debt, good health, decent relationships but from where I came from it was monumental to do any of it. I don't make many excuses for myself. I get frustrated at how many times I run across people who have used all kinds of excuses or manipulations to do nothing despite having more education, opportunities and help that I ever did. If I can do something with myself anyone can. You sir are an inspiration.
"The logical acrobatics people can do to direct the blame for where they are in life to anything other than themselves is astonishing. I'm sorry that I don't believe you. I don't accept your excuses." What an amazing sentence. It is an admonishment we should all follow and every high school student should read before graduating.
While researching a word (which I so grossly misspelled random searches popped up) I came across this item on "The Study of Heroism." You certainly fit the category. https://stanfordmag.org/contents/the-psychology-of-heroism
That's an interesting read for sure
Wow! I’m happy for you. It’s an inspiring story.
Justacon - I’m just curious... was the life of Jesus the inspiration to your new self discovery and commitment towards being your better self???
I appreciate you sharing your story with us! You must know, before you were born and as you faced tragedy throughout your life:
“Indeed the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not be afraid; You are far more valuable than many sparrows.” Luke 12:7
“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalm 56:8
Maybe without you knowing it, Jesus has been with you and loved you through everything you’ve experienced. It’s hard to believe in a loving God (Father) when our own birth fathers care not one wit, but our Heavenly Father has proven that He is faithful, my friend. 🙏🏻 Gby and your loved ones as you continue to take the road least traveled... that will lead you to His door!
No, I can't say any brand of faith led me here. If I'm being completely honest, I'm keeping a promise to the men I left behind in those walls. With 15 years, I was the short timer. Most of them will never get out and many put their hopes and dreams into me. I love my brothers, so now I live for them because society said we were a lost cause. I have to make them proud, those men who raised me in there.