Great piece! Still considering all you’ve laid out here in terms of politics and political agendas. But 💯 agree that pornography and the devaluation of women has got to stop. It’s a human issue. Really appreciate your writing style - to the point with a dash of well placed real life humor. Been both the daycare mom and barefoot with chickens.😂
My read on the issue is very different, although I come to some of the same conclusions. Feminism basic core is that women are treated less than by society. In fact, society largely treats women differently, but not less than. The pay-gap-therefore-discrimination cabal has been debunked many times. However, small, vocal contingents of women and male allies keep harping.
Most abortions are of the inconvenience variety, the only others are mothers’ health, rape or incest. All three of the exceptions are likely around 10-12% of the total.
Conservative media is telling men to get off porn. Not only does it portray woman dangerously, it manipulates the male female dynamic. Relationships are more than just sex to be sure. While men are more than 90% of porn users, it is not the case that 90% of men use porn. This is a fallacy of composition. Yet, too many young men watch and they should stop.
Men and women are complementary for a reason and should be treated as such. Neither should be denigrated, behavior should be denigrated.
Very interesting. The abortion debaters always have females in isolation, and the debate always starts after conception and uses statements such as "She got pregnant" and "Unplanned pregnancy." This implies the woman went to the store to "get" a pregnancy and that the gestational function of female biology is the problem, ignoring the male/female coupling and the choice a man made to ignore his fertility and to not use a condom. It was only a matter of time before IVF displayed the inherent hypocrisy. "Saying that everything is Feminism's fault gives men a way to avoid responsibility and protect their debauchery." This also gives those women so inclined to pat themselves on the back, and something to fall back on to excuse the maladjusted behavior of the men in their life. Another word used in this manner is "gatekeeper." If women are the "gatekeepers" of sexual relations, any failure is due to the woman. Ironically, this also implies an immaturity in men who are unable to throttle their own choice to engage in sexual relations unless stopped by the more mature female. I raised our son to take responsibility for himself, including if, when and with whom he might choose to copulate. He was also raised to accept responsibility for a resulting conception, even if it was a fleeting relation. If there's a conception, then marry if she agrees. I read an article back in the mid-to-late 80's about research done by a graduate student at William and Mary. This student studied early colonial marriage and birth records and found that even after taking into account for some early births, the majority of the couples had engaged in sex prior to marriage. It appears that once they had sex, both were committed, or perhaps once they decided to marry, they felt no need to wait. The development of the BCP gave men the excuse to hang fertility control for both around the woman's neck. It gave both men and women more opportunity for recreational sex unmoored from consequences.
This was such an out of touch, senseless, bitter misandrist deflection from how hateful and low quality modern American women are. This lady does not have a clue what she is talking about.
This is not your mother's or grandmother's feminism. This is the era of the "Girl Boss" the men and boy haters, the first woman this, the first woman that. The shout and celebrate your abortion type of feminism. The feminism that allows and forments misogyny by men in dresses. These woman consider the female- male relationship entirely transactional. Believe all women and the me too campaigns made it transactional, if you want to destroy a man just shout out your preferred slogans and you will be believed, no matter how ridiculous. These are also the same feminists marching alongside the most misogynistic societies in the world. These men cut a womens clitoris so the woman can't enjoy sex and wrap them up from head to toe. But those damn Republican men...
This is a very interesting topic because to me it's symptomatic of a bigger problem. While I agree with your concerns, I see many flaws in your argument. There are plenty of men who don't watch porn who treat women terribly (in or out of the bedroom) and plenty of men who do watch porn who treat the women in their lives with the utmost respect. So there is no cause and effect. This may be a different story for young men and teens, I honestly don't know but I suspect porn's negative influence holds true for anyone, adult or child, who wasn't raised or exposed to good examples of loving relationships.
And let me point out the obvious: while most viewers watching porn are men, women are the ones spreading their legs. Sorry to be so blunt, but if women didn't promote, participate and prosper off online porn, there would be no porn online. But they do and sites like OnlyFans have exploded because, well, just look at the money these women make! I've heard some porn influencers say they use the money to put themselves through college. If women couldn't earn a dime from porn, my bet is the industry would dry up instantly.
Others say they have built friendships with their clients. Still others say they love the attention. What does that tell you? To me it means young people are starved for validation and connection. This is not feminism issue. This is an economic and cultural problem. All very similar to the oldest profession in the world, prostitution, and online porn is social media's prostitution.
As a culture we need to stop dividing everything into tribal arguments: men vs women, POC vs white, Dems vs Republicans. We need to start looking at root causes, stop blaming each other, recognize the deeply entrenched economics of scarcity that permeates our culture from every corner, demand leadership that gives a damn about its people, and heal this very broken world.
The article says many men "need a scapegoat for the bitterness, guilt, and shame caused by their ugly habit." I agree there are men who blame women/feminism rather than taking responsibility for themselves but what is the evidence that online porn is the cause?
Great piece! Still considering all you’ve laid out here in terms of politics and political agendas. But 💯 agree that pornography and the devaluation of women has got to stop. It’s a human issue. Really appreciate your writing style - to the point with a dash of well placed real life humor. Been both the daycare mom and barefoot with chickens.😂
My read on the issue is very different, although I come to some of the same conclusions. Feminism basic core is that women are treated less than by society. In fact, society largely treats women differently, but not less than. The pay-gap-therefore-discrimination cabal has been debunked many times. However, small, vocal contingents of women and male allies keep harping.
Most abortions are of the inconvenience variety, the only others are mothers’ health, rape or incest. All three of the exceptions are likely around 10-12% of the total.
Conservative media is telling men to get off porn. Not only does it portray woman dangerously, it manipulates the male female dynamic. Relationships are more than just sex to be sure. While men are more than 90% of porn users, it is not the case that 90% of men use porn. This is a fallacy of composition. Yet, too many young men watch and they should stop.
Men and women are complementary for a reason and should be treated as such. Neither should be denigrated, behavior should be denigrated.
Very interesting. The abortion debaters always have females in isolation, and the debate always starts after conception and uses statements such as "She got pregnant" and "Unplanned pregnancy." This implies the woman went to the store to "get" a pregnancy and that the gestational function of female biology is the problem, ignoring the male/female coupling and the choice a man made to ignore his fertility and to not use a condom. It was only a matter of time before IVF displayed the inherent hypocrisy. "Saying that everything is Feminism's fault gives men a way to avoid responsibility and protect their debauchery." This also gives those women so inclined to pat themselves on the back, and something to fall back on to excuse the maladjusted behavior of the men in their life. Another word used in this manner is "gatekeeper." If women are the "gatekeepers" of sexual relations, any failure is due to the woman. Ironically, this also implies an immaturity in men who are unable to throttle their own choice to engage in sexual relations unless stopped by the more mature female. I raised our son to take responsibility for himself, including if, when and with whom he might choose to copulate. He was also raised to accept responsibility for a resulting conception, even if it was a fleeting relation. If there's a conception, then marry if she agrees. I read an article back in the mid-to-late 80's about research done by a graduate student at William and Mary. This student studied early colonial marriage and birth records and found that even after taking into account for some early births, the majority of the couples had engaged in sex prior to marriage. It appears that once they had sex, both were committed, or perhaps once they decided to marry, they felt no need to wait. The development of the BCP gave men the excuse to hang fertility control for both around the woman's neck. It gave both men and women more opportunity for recreational sex unmoored from consequences.
This was such an out of touch, senseless, bitter misandrist deflection from how hateful and low quality modern American women are. This lady does not have a clue what she is talking about.
Some additional thoughts on female equality in the context of feminism, and about the prevalence of porn:
https://www.wrongspeakpublishing.com/p/how-healthy-male-and-female-roles?utm_source=publication-search
https://www.wrongspeakpublishing.com/p/balancing-a-computerized-world?utm_source=publication-search
Terrific perspective, Carolann. ZL
This is not your mother's or grandmother's feminism. This is the era of the "Girl Boss" the men and boy haters, the first woman this, the first woman that. The shout and celebrate your abortion type of feminism. The feminism that allows and forments misogyny by men in dresses. These woman consider the female- male relationship entirely transactional. Believe all women and the me too campaigns made it transactional, if you want to destroy a man just shout out your preferred slogans and you will be believed, no matter how ridiculous. These are also the same feminists marching alongside the most misogynistic societies in the world. These men cut a womens clitoris so the woman can't enjoy sex and wrap them up from head to toe. But those damn Republican men...
This is a very interesting topic because to me it's symptomatic of a bigger problem. While I agree with your concerns, I see many flaws in your argument. There are plenty of men who don't watch porn who treat women terribly (in or out of the bedroom) and plenty of men who do watch porn who treat the women in their lives with the utmost respect. So there is no cause and effect. This may be a different story for young men and teens, I honestly don't know but I suspect porn's negative influence holds true for anyone, adult or child, who wasn't raised or exposed to good examples of loving relationships.
And let me point out the obvious: while most viewers watching porn are men, women are the ones spreading their legs. Sorry to be so blunt, but if women didn't promote, participate and prosper off online porn, there would be no porn online. But they do and sites like OnlyFans have exploded because, well, just look at the money these women make! I've heard some porn influencers say they use the money to put themselves through college. If women couldn't earn a dime from porn, my bet is the industry would dry up instantly.
Others say they have built friendships with their clients. Still others say they love the attention. What does that tell you? To me it means young people are starved for validation and connection. This is not feminism issue. This is an economic and cultural problem. All very similar to the oldest profession in the world, prostitution, and online porn is social media's prostitution.
As a culture we need to stop dividing everything into tribal arguments: men vs women, POC vs white, Dems vs Republicans. We need to start looking at root causes, stop blaming each other, recognize the deeply entrenched economics of scarcity that permeates our culture from every corner, demand leadership that gives a damn about its people, and heal this very broken world.
The article says many men "need a scapegoat for the bitterness, guilt, and shame caused by their ugly habit." I agree there are men who blame women/feminism rather than taking responsibility for themselves but what is the evidence that online porn is the cause?