Eboni K Williams Delivers Some Hard Truths To Black Women On Marriage

Growing up I was always taught that it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.  You can have a great message but delivered wrong can fall on deaf ears. It seems like Eboni K Williams found herself in that situation setting Twitter on fire and going viral in the process. 

The lawyer-turned-reality star urged black women to seek marriage in college or soon after. She also went on a further rant questioning black women’s desirability and market value as they age. 

While the last part of her speech sounds like a podcasting episode with Andrew Tate or the now banned Fresh And Fit, I do believe her sound advice on marriage can not only help black women’s social life but help jumpstart more marriages in the black community.  

In the four-minute speech with the grio, she lays everything on the table while talking to black women.  She says “This will be the last time that you will be in such a concentrated space with this many, presumably available, men of projected equal educational and financial positioning,” she nails the hit on the head. We live in a society where black women want to be on an equal level with their male partners where they prefer the same level of education and financial earning capabilities. 

The calls for egalitarian dating is something black women are fighting which is shown by the recent backlash of Tyler Perry. He was seen on a viral clip urging black women to find someone of lower status if the love is there. Black women pushed back on Tyler Perry stating that they would not lower their standards or engage in struggle love. 

So it would make sense to follow Eboni K Williams's advice. Look for a partnership in a place where you have the same aspirations for higher education and earning potential which solves the hardest part of dating finding a like-minded partner who values the same things. 

Another reason Eboni K Williams gets it right is because the longer you wait to marry the more likely you are to end up cohabitating or in an undefined relationship. The drawbacks of cohabitation as opposed to a healthy marriage as been drawn out in data for many years now. 

Cohabitating partners are less likely to marry and have a lower level of satisfaction so if you want to marry it’s better to start early in life when both ppl are not so set in their ways and are open to being flexible and compromising. The hidden cost of waiting to marry is that you have a higher chance of dating someone with emotional baggage which can make communication and emotional connection all the more difficult. Eboni K Williams was correct while you are seeking career advancement you should seek a life partner both are equally important and don’t have to be sacrificed at the expense of the other choice. 

I believe in her marriage advice because that’s the route I took.  My wife and I married in our mid-20s at the beginning of our work careers. We grow up together in love, health, and finances.  We are stronger because of our choices early in life. 

We have to get rid of the myth that we must have everything together in order to date. Sometimes the journey is meant to be traveled together. We should be speaking up more about marriage in terms of how to better your chances of success and giving it the same importance of individual success marriage should be the goal of all who want it.

I know many women will push back with disrespect and disregard for my opinion.  But in order to change things we have to be able to try something different or be willing to challenge the most popular relationship trends to see what works best.  If you are a successful black woman looking for a successful partner just remember like Eboni said “ you can simultaneously pursue that MRS degree right along with that BA or JD.”

David Sypher Jr.  Former Republican candidate for NJ state assemblyman legislative district 22.